“This Was A Prison”

from google images

No one knows

My inner heart

Where my feelings are conflicted

And restricted…

They all say “you’re in the closet”

But I feel more like I’m imprisoned

Trapped inside myself

Dark, solitary confinement

In the dark

I can still hear

Homophobic slurs

The disgusting jeers

Violence and hate are used to create

Humiliation and shame

And loveless preachers preach that hell is a queer person’s fate

Yet the outed walk hand in hand with their dates

Pride shines on each face

I long to be with them

But for now, I’m safe

I’m behind bars

Locked away

In the dark

Where it’s quiet

Where I’m surpressed

My feelings

My thoughts

Passion and lust for love

Are all safe from hate

I hate that I have to “come out”

Why can’t a girl loving another girl be a norm?

It’s just the way some girls are born…

But even after many years

Many people coming out

And being proud

It’s still not widely accepted

In some places, being queer is not even talked about

At least I now know

And I can admit it

I like girls

I like them a lot

But journal, you’re the only one that knows

You’re the only one that I can

Talk to

And it sucks that in this jail

This closet

I am alone.

© 2013-2014 Vic Romero

<<wrote this on 14 December 2013 before I came out to a few people…although I have come out to the most important people in my life (excluding my parents), I still feel like I’m in the closet (especially because my parents don’t know) but at least now I have people (and an amazing girl) to connect to and talk about my sexuality with.  Anyway, below is the quote that inspired me to write this poem.  The quote below that one is a great reflection of how I feel about my sexuality nowadays.  Thank you for reading 🙂 >>

“They got it wrong when they called it “the closet.” This was a prison. Solitary confinement. I was locked inside, inside myself, dark and afraid and alone. (Chapter. 23)”
― Julie Anne Peters, Keeping You a Secret

“The best thing about coming out is, it’s totally liberating. You feel like you’ve made this incredible discovery about yourself and you want to share it and be open and honest and not spend all your time wondering how is this person going to react, or should I be careful around this person, or what will the neighbors say? And it’s more. It’s about getting past the question of what’s wrong with me, to knowing there’s nothing wrong, that you were born this way. You’re a normal person and a beautiful person and you should be proud of who you are. You deserve to live with dignity and show people your pride.”

― Julie Anne Peters, Keeping You a Secret

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