“When These Open Doors Were Open-Ended”

Tonight will be my second to last day of work.  I’ve been at my job for over a year now, and I am actually going to miss working there.  Aside from missing the great discount on food, I will miss the friendships that developed in between dealing with rude customers and long hours of physical labor. 

When I first started my job, I was feeling kinda depressed and lonely…I’m now leaving this job with amazing memories and inside jokes that I wouldn’t trade for anything.  My job became a safe haven for me when I was having trouble at home…I also fell in love at my job and had my heart broken too.  I have learned valuable people skills, money and time management, and how to make a killer milkshake that brings all the boys to the yard.   

Because I’ve been at my job for over a year, my name was listed on the “One Year Of Service” form and it read that I was a Guest Service Expert.  I never planned on staying at this job for so long, but I’m glad I did. 

My job aside, other things in my life are quickly changing.  My close friends are leaving for college, one of them is leaving tomorrow.  Now when I hang out with my friends, it feels like a final goodbye, even though it won’t be for forever.  

My ex-girlfriend has agreed to physically see me sometime next week so we can talk.  I have been wanting to bring up getting back together, after a dream I had of her last night and some other thoughts, I’m just not so sure.  In the dream, we were cuddling like we used to…her body on top of mine and her cheek on my chest.  She was telling me that she was tired of me always leaving her.  When I woke up, sad because I miss her, I really began to consider staying broken up.  Maybe I would be more willing to stay together if we had better communication…I’m not sure if she’s even interested in a relationship right now because she’s overwhelmed with work and her life…she took down our anniversary date from her bio on Instagram so I feel like that’s a sign from her that it’s over.  I wanna know what she’s thinking and talk it all out…although I honestly believe that we won’t get back together. It breaks my heart but logically…and just from the way she’s been acting…I think it’s over.  Maybe we can be friends..but I don’t know. I just need to focus on moving on.  

My college has their own blog run by students, and I want to apply.  It’s an unpaid position but I thought it would be something awesome to do because I enjoy blogging and I think it will be a neat experience.  

Speaking of college, my roommate may not even be able to go to my college anymore because of financial issues.  I have no idea what will happen if she can’t go…will I be alone in my room??? Will I get assigned another roommate?? I’m scared, and I wish I could talk to my ex about it but I must refrain from that.  

Anyway…it’s almost noon now.  I should get out of bed lol

I hope you all have a lovely day 🙂

-Victoria

*Title is a lyric from the song Saturday by Fall Out Boy

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2 thoughts on ““When These Open Doors Were Open-Ended”

  1. Definitely talk to your ex, At least to hash everything out and see how she feels as well otherwise you will not know. You may get assigned a new roommate. Cheer up butter cup, Big Hugs

    1. Yeah, we just are having trouble finding time to get together unfortunately :/ maybe..I hope whatever roommate I have won’t be too much of a hassle. I’m trying but it’s hard to stay happy sometimes..thank u Lana I really needed some hugs <33

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